That NEW Adage

A pressure-relief valve about God, and just about everything else.

This is Your Soul on “Ignorant”

I got this YouTube clip from my friend, Phil, at http://phillyflash.wordpress.com/

We sin daily, and I know that when I bend my knee tonight I will have to clear from my account all the sinful wishes I had for Todd Bentley when I saw him here kick a stage four colon cancer patient in the colon! People are so desperate and often so ill-informed, and this is how they are treated.

Actually, Bentley is just doing physically what all the hucksters do spiritually.

The Lord takes no pleasure in the fate of the wicked. I ain’t God, and I’m earnestly working on that aspect of myself…

Any questions?

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July 4, 2008 Posted by | Charlatans, Christ, Christianity, Creflo Dollar, E. Bernard Jordan, Eddie Long, Faith Healer, False Doctrine, False Prophets, False Teachers, Florida Healing Outpouring, God, Joel Osteen, John Hagee, Joyce Meyer, Juanita Bynum, Kenneth Copeland, Kenneth Hagin, Paul Crouch, Paula White, Praise-a-thon, Prosperity Gospel, Pulpit Pimps, Rant, Robert Tilton, Rod Parsley, T.D. Jakes, TBN, Televangelists, Todd Bentley | 14 Comments

Engarde!

 This is a poem I wrote back in the nineties for a family member who wanted something for a church program. (It was my former home church, and I saw them beginning to fold in some Word of faith language and practice into the way of worship. This was a subtle way of letting them know a better route. It went ignored. I left.) It sums up my thinking concerning why I call out false teaching when I see it. It is not artsy and metaphorical.

The poem is different from the popular form of today. It rhymes.

What can we, as Christians, do to guard the Holy Word?

Exhort the body urgently to test the things they’ve heard

While television ministries abound, and are immense,  

The bulk of them are dubious to people on the fence.

Their doctrine is heretical, their prophecies are false.

Yet millions call them “acts of God”– the strange, hypnotic waltz.

But those among us tossed and blown by every wind of teaching,

Are unequipped to take the hands of wary skeptics reaching.

If we persist to give the Word a cursory perusal,

The world will greet our invitation with a flat refusal.

So be encouraged! Learn the Word for which the martyrs bled

And “show thyself approved” to speak and stand for Christ, the Head!

November 20, 2007 Posted by | Charlatans, Christianity, Creflo Dollar, Eddie Long, Frederick Price, Joyce Meyer, Juanita Bynum, Kenneth Copeland, Paul Crouch, Paula White, Pulpit Pimps, Rod Parsley, TBN, Word of Faith | 1 Comment

Reverend Corleone, Bishop Soprano, and Prophet Gotti

All the noise about the senate investigation of Klepto Dollar, Eddie Long(money), and the rest of the Prosperity Perps got me thinking.

We hear them all say, when asked about their ostentatious possessions, “It ain’t mine! It belongs to tha chu’ch!”

You know who else says that when grilled by the authorities? The Mafia! Drug dealers! Fat-cat corporate big wigs! Folks who get pulled over with weed in their pockets! (“Thass my cuzzin’ weed, Mr. Ossifer*! I swear! Theeze ain’t even my pants!”)

Is this just a co-incidence? Is it happenstance that the known crooks funnel their money through a maze of dummy corporations and “legitimate businesses” in the same way that these Prosperity Punks funnel all their stuff through the church?

It’s funny, though… When I heard I.V. Hilliard, another one, bragging about buying a jet, when I heard Fred Price boasting about his multi-thousand-dollar exoticar, I didn’t hear them say it belonged to the chu’ch. It was theirs! When Klepto and Taffi did that big spread in Ebony magazine a couple years ago, I don’t recall seeing them say that stuff belonged to the church, either.

As a partner of mine used to say, “These cats slicker than owl… feces!” 

Pity, though. Paula White can’t say that her plastic surgery belongs to the church.

The Church, however, does need a facelift!

*Officer

November 13, 2007 Posted by | Christianity, Creflo Dollar, Current Events, Eddie Long, False Prophets, Frederick Price, Joyce Meyer, Kenneth Copeland, Paula White, Pulpit Pimps, TBN, Televangelists, Word of Faith | 6 Comments

If They Think THIS is Bad, Wait Till GOD Gets His Hands on ‘Em!

Okay, let’s see where we are: Creflo Dollar, Benny Hinn, Joyce Meyer, Eddie Long, Kenneth Copeland, and Paula White are being investigated by the senate finance committee.

I wonder if they feel like the mafia felt when the U.S. government turned the full force of its wrath on them… I wonder if they are getting their lies I mean stories straight and lining up their ecstatically ignorant supporters with tales of persecution and such. I can hear the accountant’s papers shuffling, and the cell phone keypads tapping. And shredders are growling and regurgitating from being hastily overfed like my boy, Max does when I find myself in too much of a hurry to get him through eating so I can get back to watching “ESPN’s First Take.”

“The Rolls was a GIFT.”

“The mansion belongs to the chu’ch!”

“I need a 10 million dollar jet! I’m too bizzy to fly commercial.”

“This cosmetic surgery was just to clear up some… waitaminnit! WHAT cosmetic surgery?” 

“I have a particular hip problem, and my research showed that only a 23,000 dollar john would get to the butt of the issue. Besides, the Bible says that we are the head, but why shouldn’t the tail be well taken care of, too?”

“I ain’ gotta anser to tha world about God’s bizzniss! My sheep know my vo-ice!” (Yeah, but I bet your sheep can’t get a meeting with you, or ride in that jet, or visit that gated mansion!)

I can just hear all of the pimpish game they will perpetrate against those who follow them and who shout loudly, “Lalalalalalalalala” to keep the truth from crawling into their ears. They will create a siege environment like Jim Jones and David Koresh did where the “world” is trying to destroy the good work and prosperous living of God’s people.

Here is the punch line, though; If they think THIS investigation is intrusive and punitive, wait until they “getta loada” what God has in store for them! The GUBment only wants to know where the money went. GOD is concerned about

every. 

          single. 

                     aspect. 

                                 of.  

                                     their. 

                                               lives.

Every detail!

They have led millions away from the TRUE gospel. One which does NOT focus on the accumulation of wealth, but on the emptiness, the broken body, the shed blood of Christ. For this it is said that it will have been better for them if John Gotti had fitted them with cement boots and dumped them into a river. Direct quote…

They have loved money rather than the Savior. They have taught others to do so.

They have demoted God, and in some strange, cosmic mutiny, promoted man to His captaincy.

They have ineptly wielded the Sword of the Word of God and sliced up the souls of multitudes, many of whom are dead, gone, and unable to hit the reset button.

God alone knows the rest of what they have done. And there are dozens, even thousands more unnamed crooks who do the same and worse.

The judgment of a senate committee is nothing compared to the Omnipotent Panel of One that awaits those who use the Bible as a Player’s Handbook in order to manipulate the finances– and souls– of so many. This same judge will evaluate us in the same manner if we eschew the Love of and service to Christ in favor of selfish pleasure.

So, Klepto Dollar, Bentley Hinder, Joyce Mirer, Eddie Long(money), Kenneth (can’t)Copeland, Paula White(washed sepulcre), it looks like you will be getting a small, small preview of what may be in store for you if you remain in your current state. As for Fred (pay the) Price, Paul Crouch(ing wolf), Joel Ovaltine and the rest of you, you obviously don’t fear the God you defame, so maybe fear of the government hammer, public disgrace and financial devastation will make you stop victimizing the weak and unlearned.

It is not with glee, but with a feeling of impending justice being meted, that I ask, in the words of that illustrious theologian, T.O.:

“You gotcho popcone reddy?”

November 8, 2007 Posted by | Benny Hinn, Charlatans, Christianity, Creflo Dollar, Eddie Long, Frederick Price, Joyce Meyer, Kenneth Copeland, News, Paul Crouch, Paula White, Pulpit Pimps, Word of Faith | 34 Comments