That NEW Adage

A pressure-relief valve about God, and just about everything else.

“Thank you! I’ll be here all week!”

I heard recently that Hitler had only half the standard number of testicles.

Hmmm… So he wasn’t nuts after all. Just evil.

Juuust evil. Thank you… Tip your waitstaff!

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February 11, 2009 Posted by | Humor, Jokes | 2 Comments

The First Joke I Ever Wrote

A wife is like a straight-jacket:

You gotta be CRAZY to get one!!

Wrote that in my bitter single days.

November 6, 2008 Posted by | Humor, Jokes, Life, Marriage, Quips | 4 Comments

“Where Do Bibles Come From?” Max asked.

My expectant wife, Kathy, and I were on the couch talking, and she remarked that Max (who is now 17 months old) has been increasingly poking her in her rapidly disappearing navel and asking, “Baby?”

She told him, “Yeah, that’s where the unbib — I mean — the umbilical cord is!”

“Yeah, son, ” I said to both of them,  “It would be called the unBIBLICAL cord only if we weren’t married!”

January 8, 2008 Posted by | Christian Life, Christianity, Family, Humor, Jokes, Malaprops, Pregnancy | 4 Comments

Marsh-malaprops II

 Recently, while Kathy and I were watching a CNN news program, I called the guest,  Al Sharpton, portly, in an effort to mitigate his true squishiness.

Kathy interjected, “No, he is ‘hogly’! as opposed to being just ‘porkly!’

I can’t stop laffin’!!! I’m gettin’ dizzy!!!

December 18, 2007 Posted by | Al Sharpton, Humor, Jokes, Malaprops, True Stories | Leave a comment