That NEW Adage

A pressure-relief valve about God, and just about everything else.

Son, Don’t Point it Till You’re Ready to Shoot!


We can leave Max alone to watch educational television on the Sprout, or Noggin networks, but we cannot leave him alone for a second on his potty.

We’re training him to go on his own, and it is proving to be the hardest thing yet about child-rearing! Kathy and I have dealt with colic, wildfires of diaper rash, mounds of “butt mustard”, gallons of re-gurj, waterfallian sinus infections, cuts, all-night feedings, soap tasting and ant eating, penny sucking, picky eating, and nap refusing, but this potty training is kickin’ us in da collective butt!

Put him on the pot and go right down the hall, “Son, don’t move!” and the next thing you know, Max is spraying the bath mats like he’s a hose-fed weed killer and they’re crabgrass, or he’s triumphantly swirling his hands around in you-ryne like he’s filming a Palmolive commercial! “You’re soaking in it!”

 Now, I have to watch out for shiny spots on the floor when I go back in to get him, or I’ll have a disgusting slip-and-fall incident. 

He’s 100% boy, and I just LOVE it! Every exasperating moment! My son!

Kathy’s gonna deevorce me for this!

 

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May 29, 2008 - Posted by | Children, Christian Life, Family, Fatherhood, Fathers and Sons, Humor, Kids, Life, Motherhood, Parenthood, Parenting, Pictures

7 Comments »

  1. We’re right their with you, D! We started potty training Sophie this week. Teething and potty training are my two least favorite things about having babies. 🙂

    Comment by Lisa | May 29, 2008 | Reply

  2. LOL. Right now, I am feeling SO relieved that I had a girl! I don’t even KNOW what I would do with this one. Seriously, I’m cracking up, but I also could cry for poor Kathy. Bring that woman some stinkin roses today!

    Btw, it took me a full YEAR to potty train my daughter, if that makes you feel any better. 🙂

    Comment by missy | May 29, 2008 | Reply

  3. Thanx, both of you.

    Comment by maxdaddy | May 29, 2008 | Reply

  4. See…that is the main reason why I am going to wait until my mom gets here in August! SHE will do the potty training of Jaxon. If we (we being me and my siblings) were potty trained before the age of two, then she is the PERFECT person to train Jaxon. I KNOW! I AM HORRIBLE!!! Sue me… 🙂

    Comment by heatherltrotter | May 29, 2008 | Reply

  5. LOL OMG!!! that was too funny because I FEEL you pain. Let me warn you….IT doesnt stop there. As you may or may not know Amari will be 4 next month and yes he is potty trained BUT (screetching tires, crashing sounds…..lol) I am trying to teach him to wipe properly when he does #2. And this is soooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo disgusting. From nasty underwear to clogging the toilet with tissue and flooding the bathroom. and then you see this sweet innocent kid that looks you in the face like they didnt do anything wrong… YOU gotta love em. Isnt it a wonderful thing to be parents 🙂

    Comment by LaDonna | May 30, 2008 | Reply

  6. I remember those days well. It seems that I mopped the bathroom floor, every day! It is really a small world, I stumbled on our blog and I was born and raised in Memphis, although I now live in Phoenix, AZ.

    Comment by Robin | June 1, 2008 | Reply

  7. Small world indeed! Thanks!

    Comment by maxdaddy | June 3, 2008 | Reply


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